Today, I turn 43 years old…I’m not sure how this happened so fast…in some ways, it seems like I’ve lived three or four lifetimes, and in other ways, like I’ve only just started living.
I am the most self confident, emotionally and mentally healthy, and happiest I have ever been in my life. I have beaten guilt and shame over many things that I’ve done in my life and come to the realization that I am human, as is everyone else on earth. I am comfortable in my chubbiness, even with my goals of becoming physically healthier. I am so blessed with my husband and son, they make my world go around.
I have also changed a lot recently in the way I treat people…I’ve started treating them the way they treat me. I used to go out of my way to talk to friends and always be readily available, but never got that in return with some. I now feel I am too old to waste my energy on chasing people down now. My love language is quality time, and if anyone can’t give me theirs, then I don’t feel the value in that relationship anymore, not saying I want it to end, just not a priority to me anymore. It doesn’t even have to be much time, just a text or an evening out to dinner once in a while or lunch.
Thankfully, I have some friends who do fill needs as my friends and who I don’t have to chase, some new and some old. They are there even when I don’t need them and that’s the best anyway. I don’t want to be the friend that people only call when they do need something and I try to not be that kind of friend too.
Something else that I have started thinking about recently, photographs…not the digital ones, but the ones you can hold in your hands or hang on your walls, and even the ones that can be put out at the funeral home when we pass away. We do not print enough anymore, do you really want all of your memories to be on a digital media that will be obselete in a few years? I don’t…I’m going to start printing every photo I take on my phone and get my a box. My mama has a photo box and albums from when I was a child and those are priceless to me, as well as the ones I have of my son.
So there’s a few ramblings on my birthday morning while I am away on a getaway my husband has taken me on. If you feel I’ve changed in some ways, maybe this will help explain it to you. Have a great safe Monday!!